Once Upon a Time
by Pegacorn Donut
Summary: Crack-fic, One-shot. Bowser is forced into reading bed-time stories to a couple of smashers. THIS ISN'T CANON.


**Hello~**

**This is Pegacorn Donut, and I really just wanted to post this One-Shot. I had this idea stuck in my head for quite a while now… Please don't review about how "I'm stealing" or this is "someone else's idea." I've seen multiple FanFictions about this, and I decided that I wanted to do it as well.** **If I do happen to coincidently use "the same characters," please know that it was not on purpose and I'm not trying to copy another story. Nothing is meant to be canon, by the way.**

**Disclaimer: Really? Ugh. I don't own anything what-so-ever, even though I wish I could.**

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It was just another day at the smash mansion.

However, an unlucky smasher was "forced to volunteer" to read bed-time stories… Oh what, fun!

"Tell me, just WHY did Master Hand choose ME, out of ALL people in this whole tournament, to read bed-time stories?" Bowser roared as he made his way down the corridor. Other smashers looked at him and snickered, while others spared looks of pity.

"Oh come on! It shouldn't be that bad! Just make sure nothing is too... suggestive or explicit! If you know what I mean," (Zero Suit) Samus tried to explain.

"At least you don't have to give them *ahem*, the TALK," Pikachu added in hopes of making Bowser cheer up.

"Thanks for jinxing that, Pikachu" Bowser snapped!

"…" Pokemon Trainer (Red) 'said.'

"Oh well. Have 'fun!'" (Zero Suit) Samus giggled.

Bowser grumbled an inaudible reply, something along the lines of 'I'm going to kill you later Samus.' Finally, Bowser arrived at the door into a room with the walls painted sunset orange. While he smashed down the door, he noticed there were 2 bunk beds and 4 small dressers in the room, with 2 desks with small lamps on top of them. Toon Link and Lucas were playing a boring game of chess, with Toon Link winning the game every single time in about 5 turns (if that's even possible). Kirby was munching—scratch that, literally _inhaling_ a 'small' night snack which consisted of 7 plates of bacon and 4 watermelons. Ness was currently back in Eagleland visiting this family and friends, so Bowser was lucky enough to have only 2 people (?) and a pink blob to read to. But what really annoyed Bowser was the fact that they were all in their pajamas. Were they expecting him to tuck them in after telling them a 'lovey-dovey happily ever after' bed time story? No! He was a KING for flips sake, not a MOMMY! Unfortunately, he was just another smasher as far as Master Hand was concerned.

"Yay! Spiked Turtle guy is going to tell us stories!" Toon Link cried out happily while jumping up and knocking the chess board and all its pieces onto Lucas without apologizing. Bowser felt like murdering him for calling him 'Spiked Turtle guy.'

"Poyo poyo!" Kirby agreed while preparing to shove tons of more food into his (**A/N: I'm making Kirby a guy, because I'm not too sure of his gender**) mouth. In his opinion, Kirby was an annoying black hole for food who could never really focus. Bowser really wanted to just shove him out the window.

"Yeah…" Lucas also agreed while reorienting himself. Bowser guessed he was such a wimp because some sad event that happened before he came here. But Bowser couldn't really care less, so he never asked.

Bowser sighed, but then decided that it would be better to get this done and over with.

"Once upon a time, there was a, uh… bear! This bear was special. It was a bear that had um…uh… FUR!" Bowser tried. Lucas and Toon Link glanced at each other with looks of confusion, and Kirby was busy entertaining himself with a giant plate of leftover sandwiches from lunch. This would be a long, sad night.

"Doesn't that sound odd? Of course it does! *nervous chuckle*. This bear would be mistaken for the, uh, platypus! Yes, the platypus! Even though in any biological and scientific way, it would be a bear it WASN'T! Do you get my point now? Okay, now this absolutely crazy and unethical story really happened…" Bowser continued. At this point, Toon Link was starting to fall asleep while Kirby kept throwing giant 'handfuls' of chips into his mouth. Lucas seemed to be the only one polite enough to listen, but he still seemed to be bored by his story.

Just as Bowser was about to continue, Kirby leaped up and bounced onto Bowser's head, deciding enough was enough. This action caused Toon Link to abruptly snap out of his half-sleep, while Lucas almost cheered because he couldn't stand hearing the story any louder.

"OW! What was that for! Come back here you unforgivable, stupid blob!" Bowser yelled out. The situation was bad enough, but now Kirby was going to get it. Bower started to breathe fire out of his fit of rage, causing the whole dormitory to start burning down. While Toon Link was used to 'a couple' Fire Arrows being launched at him and Lucas was used to a 'small' PK Fire Ω, they weren't used to giant buildings and columns of fire collapsing down in on them to ensure a painful death. They shared another look before they dashed out of the room, screaming and leaving the door open.

Kirby wasn't faring any better. He decided it was a fight-or-flight situation, and he obviously couldn't go up against a giant angry Koopa King in this setting. Kirby jumped out the window while taking a deep breath, and let the wind quickly take him to another courtyard while hovering.

…

So basically you guys aren't idiots. The ending, however, would be that the whole mansion burns down before anyone reaches Bowser and everyone perishes, even Master Hand and Crazy Hand.

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**Thanks for reading! Tell me if you want me to put a more detailed ending, while it would be kind of pointless. I might add on more stuff if I get enough positive reviews. Constructive criticism in welcomed with open arms! REMEMBER: A LOT OF THIS ISN'T CANON, SO PLEASE DON'T HOUND ME FOR PUTTING IN THINGS THAT 'WEREN'T IN THE ORIGINAL GAME.'**


End file.
